PERSONAL HEALTH

Discover new ideas for romance, seduction, intimacy and the keys to sexual pleasure in your 40's, 50's and beyond!

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How does aging affect men's sexual health?

Testosterone plays a critical role in a man's sexual experience. Testosterone levels peak in the late teens and then gradually decline. Most men notice a difference in their sexual response by age 60 to 65. The penis may take longer to become erect, and erections may not be as firm. It may take longer to achieve full arousal and to have orgasmic and ejaculatory experiences. Erectile dysfunction also becomes more common. Drugs such as sildenafil (Viagra), vardenafil (Levitra) and tadalafil (Cialis) can help men achieve or sustain an adequate erection for sexual activity.

How does aging impact women's sexual health?

As a woman approaches menopause, estrogen production decreases. As a result, most women have less natural vaginal lubrication, which can affect sexual pleasure. Women may experience emotional changes as well. While some women may enjoy sex more without worrying about pregnancy, naturally occurring changes in body shape and size may cause others to feel less sexually desirable.

What medical conditions can cause sexual health concerns?

Any condition that affects general health and well-being also affects sexual function. Illnesses that involve the cardiovascular system, high blood pressure, diabetes, hormonal problems, depression or anxiety — and the medications used to treat these conditions — can pose potential sexual health concerns.

High blood pressure, for instance, can affect your ability to become aroused, as can certain medications used to treat high blood pressure.

How can surgical procedures affect your sexual health?

Any surgical procedure that affects your pelvis and your central nervous system will have a temporary — but often significant — impact on your sexual response. The body, however, is resilient. Given time to heal and some loving attention, you can become sexually responsive again.

What advice do you have for partners who have different libidos?

Differences in libidos are a major concern for many couples. Couples can become polarized — one person initiates contact while the other avoids it. If you mainly avoid sex, take charge of some engagement. If you usually initiate sex, tell your partner what you need. If you're worried about hurting your partner's feelings, speak about your own experience. Use "I" statements — such as "I think my body responds better when ... " — to open up to your partner.

A healthy sex life is not only fulfilling, but it's also good for other aspects of your life, including your physical health and self-esteem. Adapting to your changing body can help you maintain a healthy and satisfying sex life. But you may have to make a few changes, such as allowing yourself more time to become aroused and talking more openly with your partner.

Senior sex: What changes as men get older?

As men age, testosterone levels decline and changes in desire and sexual function are common. These changes can include:

• Decreased sexual interest
• A need for more stimulation to achieve and maintain an erection and orgasm
• Shorter orgasms
• Less forceful ejaculation and less semen ejaculated
• Longer time needed to achieve another erection after ejaculation

Your health also can have a big impact on your sex life and sexual performance. If you or your partner is in poor health or has a chronic health condition, such as heart disease or arthritis, sex and intimacy become more challenging.

Certain surgeries and many medications, such as blood pressure medications, antihistamines, antidepressants and acid-blocking drugs, can affect sexual function. Adapt to your changing body and know your limitations. Focus on ways of being sexual and intimate that work for you and your partner. Talk with your doctor about your concerns.

Tips to maintain a healthy sex life later in life:

• Communicate with your partner.Open discussion of sex has become more common in recent years, but many older adults come from a generation where sex remains a taboo subject. But openly talking about your needs, desires and concerns with your partner can make you closer and help you both enjoy sex and intimacy more.
• Talk to your doctor.Talking about sexual issues with your doctor can help you maintain a healthy sex life as you age. Your doctor can help you manage chronic conditions and medications that affect your sex life. Some older men have trouble maintaining an erection or reaching orgasm. Your doctor may be able to prescribe medications or other treatments for these problems.
• Expand your definition of sex.Intercourse is only one way to have fulfilling sex. Touching, kissing and other intimate sexual contact can be just as rewarding for both you and your partner. Realize that as you age, it's normal for you and your partner to have different sexual abilities and needs. Be open to finding new ways to enjoy sexual contact and intimacy.
• Change your routine.Simple changes can improve your sex life. Change the time of day when you have sex to a time when you have the most energy. Try the morning — when you're refreshed from a good night's sleep — rather than at the end of a long day. Because it might take longer for you or your partner to become aroused, take more time to set the stage for romance, such as a romantic dinner or an evening of dancing. Try a new sexual position or explore other new ways of connecting romantically and sexually.
• Seek a partner if you're single.It's never too late for romance. It can be difficult starting a relationship after the loss of a partner or being single for a long time — but socializing is well worth the effort for many single seniors. No one ever outgrows the need for emotional closeness and intimate love. If you start an intimate relationship with a new partner, be sure to practice safe sex. Many older adults are unaware that they are still at risk of sexually transmitted diseases, such as AIDS.
• Stay healthy.Eating regular nutritious meals, staying active, not drinking too much alcohol, and not smoking or using illicit drugs are important for your overall health, and staying healthy can help your sexual performance. Follow your doctor's instructions for taking medications and managing any chronic health conditions.
• Stay positive.The changes that come with aging — from health problems to changes in appearance and sexual performance — leave many men feeling less attractive or feeling they're less capable of enjoying or giving sexual pleasure. Discussing your feelings with your partner can help. Feeling angry, unhappy or depressed has a strong negative impact on your sex life. Professional counseling or other treatment can improve your sex life — and your well-being.

Sex may not be the same for you or your partner as it was when you both were young. But by adapting to your changing body, sex and intimacy can continue to be a fulfilling and rewarding part of your life.